NEVER !


Nisha 
Real name, Real story !

I was 16, was coming back home from college. I saw few of my neighbor's standing in a group, it looked as if they were having a serious discussion. After being a part of their gossip, I came home and told my aunt what was cooking in the community.  

There was a nuclear  family in the building D, Nisha who was the mother of an 8 year old boy, had suddenly left her husband and her son, last night  with a note saying she is never coming back !

 Let me give you a glimpse of the gossip now, from people who barely knew Nisha, forget being called as her friends, made these baseless remarks:

I heard Nisha was having an affair? I don't really know with whom?

Oh yes, Nisha was secretive, she never spoke much.

Nisha was snobbish, she never invited anyone to her house.

Yes, I have never seen her smile.

I remember how she left the park  when I was asked her about the strange marks on hand and forehead. She was so rude.

On weekends, I have only seen her son and husband hanging out together, Nisha is always missing. When I asked her husband about Nisha, he said She is too busy .

Oh, her poor son. I wonder how he will face this situation. Its going to scar him for life.

My aunt asked me what was I thinking. I said "I don't know, I never spoke to Nisha aunty, I have just seen her few times. I am confused, or maybe I don't have a opinion right now."


My wise aunt said "Never be judgmental, NEVER judge a married couple. What happens between two people is known only to them and them alone. All these people who call Nisha a snob never once thought maybe she didn't have anything to smile about. She never invited anyone home, because she didn't want anyone to know see her life closely and maybe it was not a home at all. She was missing on weekends because she was not allowed to join them. Her son might eventually learn to deal with his loss, but will the society stop harassing him? I don't know what must have really happened. 

But I do know this  Who are we to Judge?"

why judge a married woman leaving her husband, bloody indian society, Nisha


An older post, which you might like to read "MY GrandUNcle's Wedding" !

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About Ananya

52 comments:

  1. Yeah, who are we to judge. :) Followed you.

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  2. So true, Ananya but guess till there are humans, there is bound to be prejudice. We claim to be experts in other people matters and except our own. Mind our business is something we need to learn.

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  3. Yes, who are we to judge. But then we forget - we all enjoy gossiping, and it doesn't matter where in the world you live. Not that it makes it right...Alana visiting from the UBC.

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  4. Following from Blogging AtoZ.
    I'm writing "Things My Husband Has Broken" A to Z at http://AMomsPointOfView.com
    Come by and check it out.

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  5. If only everyone thought like your aunt. Why pike in some one else's matter. I agree with her not being judgemental view.

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  6. so true! who r v to judge others! such a wise aunt teaching so many important lessons so beautifully :)

    http://swathishenoy.blogspot.in/2014/04/n-for-nostalgia.html?m=1
    a-z participant

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  7. There is a nice lesson in your post.Never judge people without knowing all facts is a dictum honoured in breach.

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  8. Oh yes! People just never stop judging. ..

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  9. Life is just too short to spend time judging others when there is so much else to do

    PhenoMenon
    http://throodalookingglass.com/2014/04/nachos/

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  10. True.. Gossip-monger judges are detrimental to the society

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  11. Ditto is happening in my apartment when a male member is helping out a lady and her son. It's so annoying. People never stop gosipping or judging. Specimens. here from a-z (http://jiljilramamani.blogspot.com)

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  12. We Indians if we put our equal efforts we use in jumping to conclusions- in jumping in olympics we may win a gold medal.
    Who are we to question ?
    That is so true

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  13. Well, I agree! How can we know what is going on in someone else's life?

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  14. Everyone needs to be more tolerant. A really interesting post. Thank you so much, nice to follow and connect through atozchallenge.
    http://aimingforapublishingdeal.blogspot.co.uk

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  15. so true....... never be judgmental is the key to peaceful life!

    ~S(t)ri
    Participant|AtoZ Challenge 2014
    Smile, it makes (y)our day!

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  16. True, in all probabilities, Nisha had suffered much more that what she could possibly endure. ( Not that she should have endured even an iota of injustice ; that's not needed at all). Why judge her ? She's a woman, and she has her own reasons for being what she is. Who are we to judge ? !

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  17. Most of us won't share your grief and sorrow but enjoy the sadistic pleasure by watching your tears and bad days. We shall always like that you be ever in grief and in bad days. A news of your even petty gains make me jealous and somehow rather I shall twist it and even tell lies about the gain. This is the tradition of our Indian society it was there, it is there and shall be there.

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  18. Who knows what the husband had done for her to take that extreme step? Why does society always single out women as the villian of the piece and save all their symnpathy for the men?

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  19. Being judgemental is natural to us and is an unconscious thing but we should try not being judgemental especially when we don't know the whole story

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  20. but do people understand? it is right that all of us are judgmental by instinct but we can curb it...can't we?

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  21. I think we are so quick to judge people that we lose all sense and sensibility...Truly who are we to judge!

    N for Nauseated-Random Thoughts Naba

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  22. That's true what happens between two people only they know...but the whole world never leaves a chance to be judgmental :(

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  23. We can never really know what goes on between two people. Hey, we can never be fully aware of what goes on inside our minds! So why even try to guess and judge others with all this ignorance that we are steeped in. A very good post, Ananya!

    Beauty Interprets, Expresses, Manifests the Eternal

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  24. Yes who are we to judge others! Beautiful write Ananya ,as usual

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  25. Hi, Another true and wise tale. Truly we are no one to judge at what challenges one faces and how they handle them.
    You changed the look of the blog, it looks nice. Came back after a while.

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  26. True...people know only to talk but they will never come closer and learn.

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  27. People simply can not judge others. No one knows or understands their life completely. ♥

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  28. So true. We never do know what is going on in a marriage, do we? Your aunt sure had a big impact on your life.

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  29. We judge too easily.....even though we know nothing of their background or the situation.Your post has brought out very clearly ,what we are always doing ....passing judgements on others every minute !

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  30. Society talks. We cannot change that. The one thing and the only thing we can change is our perception. I am glad that your aunt had the wisdom to share that with you, Ananya. Stay blessed.

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  31. It's sad how people are so ready to jump to conclusions! Your aunty is a very wise lady!

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  32. Exactly.. so rightly said.. Who are we to judge...? Yet, everybody will. The society is more interested in knowing what is happening in my home rather than minding their own business !!

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  33. clear case of 'jumping into conclusions' right? these people should try writing fiction :)

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  34. because that what people think they are best at :(

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  35. Such an important message. We really don't know, and you're right - who are we to judge?

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  36. Nice post, Ananya! Only if the world thinks like you do!

    www.mytinycaterpillar.blogspot.com
    www.ammaknowsbest.blogspot.co.uk

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  37. Yes, particularly what happens between a married couple. A good message here.

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  38. How true. Who are we to judge? We don't know what has happened to that person

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  39. Exactly! Who are we to judge?

    I'm glad finally Nisha chose to break out. I hope she finds love and peace somewhere else.

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  40. 'Never be judgemental' is the essence! Nice post!

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  41. Gossiping...judging...questioning...when people learn to stay out of others' private lives??

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  42. Well said.. Never judge anyone but yourself.. we never know what they have been through. People are gossiping on how rude that lady was, ever though her husband might've been rude to her? No one talks about that.

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  43. We need more sensible people like your Aunt. And also people who'll mind their own business...

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  44. We can never know what the other person is going through in their life.

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  45. Thanks for the share Ananya. So true, we always know only one side of the story and judgments are so easy to make based on that. I guess the truth probably would always be to identify that what we perceive is only what we see of and there definitely is a lot more to the person than that!

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  46. Yeah isnt that crazy society we live in.We make others tragedy our gossip stories.I have heard so many like these,and everytime I do I feel like saying shut up,wat do you know after all.

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  47. Very nicely written. It is true, being Judgmental is like aiming for the target with closed eyes!

    Captive Of Thoughts, Do Visit

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  48. Who are we to judge.. ??
    But we feel free to give our opinions even though they are baseless & full of assumptions.
    need more practical and sensible people like your aunt..!!

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