Confidence is inversely proportional to Weight


April 25th 2012 


The title says it all !


I was never a skinny girl throughout my teenage days and fortunately it never bothered me. I was concerned about how I looked but not to the extent that it concerns the teenagers these days. Wow I sound as if I am in my fifties. But hey I can see what they call a 'Generation Gap' when I talk to someone who is just 5 years younger than I am. I am not judging them because they think differently. If someone is aware at a early age,  of what they eat and want to choose a healthier lifestyle for themselves by working out and avoiding junk food then thats good right !

I was a size 4 when I moved to Seattle. Within few months, just 6 months I grew bigger as they say and became a size 8. Now if I say that didn't affect my confidence then I would be lying. It did affect me adversely because I was not fitting in my old clothes.  When I went shopping I would try clothes that I used to like before but now they didn't look the same on me.

If you ask me why I didn't start working out or eating healthy. I would blame it on my health issues, Seattle weather,  my thyroid and other medications. But in my heart I knew the real reason is - 'I am just too damn LAZY'. I am an emotional eater and good food makes me happy.

With all that weight comes the self doubt. It was not that I was unhappy all the time but just sometimes I would get upset. I saw as my weight increased my confidence decreased. It was as if I gained the extra weight from the confidence I lost. And the worst was when I understood I was not alone. I met many others who were in the same boat, that boat was overflowing ;)

I saw women who were curvy or gently put healthy women would dress down. They all seemed to have a fixed dress code enforced by themselves and never really tried anything else.

One fine evening while I was sitting and enjoying my tea, I received a text from my friend. It was a casual text from India she had just woken up and she said how much she missed me and life was just not the same. It was that moment something hit me like lightening. I started reading my texts/emails from my friends  and acquaintances and even from the love of my life- my husband. I realized each one of them loved me and adored me for what I was and NOT what I weighed.  Relationships could not be built on something as trivial as looks. Over the years, new friendships were beginning to build and I felt welcomed into their lives, irrespective of me being 140 Lbs.

Mr. R also helped me realize that I didn't have to stop enjoying getting dressed, I just need to change my style and dress according to my body. He encouraged me to style myself differently and explore what made me feel good.

My thin strapped dresses were now replaced with sleeves. Off shoulders tops were accompanied with beautiful lace shrugs. The hemline of dresses changed. Bandage dresses were replaced by skater dresses. I added more dark colors to my wardrobes and prints were my favorites now. There were so many changes that happened gradually.

Don't ask me if this was good or bad, I don't know ! I just shopped according to my new body type and I felt good. I did this for myself and not to fit in someone else's acceptance criteria. I started feeling good about myself and I have never looked back since then. I felt happy and overwhelmed as if I had discovered something and I so wanted to share it with others as well. So that's when I started writing Fashion Section on my blog.

A decade ago I was absolutely flawless with the perfect skin, I was confident then but i am more confident now even with all the extra weight ;)

I realized its my personality, my profession, my relationships, my nature, my work and Mr. R that makes me look and feel beautifully confident from inside out and not the mere number, which is 144 today !  
Share on Google Plus

About Ananya Kiran

The Official Website of Ananya Kirann. Seattle Lifestyle blogger and Brand, Event Promoter and Youtuber. Featuring Daily Fashion Styles,Tips and more

41 comments:

  1. Ananya! One thing I'd like to say: Don't let the world shame you as long as you are in happy space and confident the person that you are. I think you are a very beautiful woman that carries yourself with elan. You might be interested with the interview of Shuchi Singh Kalra on my blog where she speaks about weight issues where women but also men are made to feel bad as well as her book, I AM BIG SO WHAT!!

    https://vishalbheeroo.wordpress.com/2016/06/03/fatglam-shuchi-singh-kalra-on-the-move/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes u said it right, thanks Vishal !

      Delete
  2. Every personal memoir you have is such an inspiration. Loved reading about this amazing and strong woman. As a teen or growing up I was never the traditional skinny but its acceptance helps a lot

    ReplyDelete
  3. Great post Ananya ... You are lovely and I feel the same about weight sometimes.. But I am 51 so can't be two ties skinny no more! Xo val

    ReplyDelete
  4. I discovered many new things from your article. Thank you for this!

    Well, our products: cheap quinceanera gowns online

    ReplyDelete
  5. I love this! I've never been skinny either, and I always wished that I could be model thin because all the clothes seem to look good on them - but you're right. It's all about dressing for your body type. Some clothes look better on me than they do on slimmer people, and some look better on them than they do to me. And honestly, nothing is worth cutting back on the love we call food.

    -M
    The Life of Little Me

    ReplyDelete
  6. Brilliantly said Anaya ... and you are absolutely fabulous :D

    ReplyDelete
  7. Loved the article!! I could relate to a lot of things you have said in the article and totally loved reading it! Keep it up and would love to know more about Mr. R :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Loved the article!! I could relate to a lot of things you have said in the article and totally loved reading it! Keep it up and would love to know more about Mr. R :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Ajeta ;) definitely will write more Abt him !

      Delete
  9. You are so right. The boat is overflowing!. It's time we get off this boat and enjoy life at whatever number we have reached (both age wise and weight wise!)

    ReplyDelete
  10. This is such an inspiring write up!!! Brilliant Ananya! Kudos to you. I felt so good reading your post :) I am in a similar situation except that I was really skinny and then I put on weight with pregnancies and I LOVE food. Trying hard to lose those extra pounds. I have come to realize they will be there forever.. ;) Keep up the good work! Kudos to Mr. R

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank u for ur kind words of appreciation Pavana :)

      Delete
  11. wow , thats a great post .
    take a look at my new post "THE BRIDAL FILE"
    http://bit.ly/29A7YtC

    XOXO
    NEENA

    ReplyDelete
  12. such a lovely post Ananya.. It's very true that our confidence starts deteriorating with weight.. at point we have to accept our body the way it is, but we should also ensure that it is healthy. At the end of the day that's what matters

    ReplyDelete
  13. Totally agree with you Ananya! One should be comfortable in one's original skin! I was skinny before but motherhood caused weight gain and bad skin. I feel dejected sometimes but that does not stop me from flaunting fashion!
    http://www.docdivatraveller.com/

    ReplyDelete
  14. I love the way you style yourself. A very inspiring post, Ananya :)

    ReplyDelete
  15. Pleasing personality. Eyes reflect the good soul within. That is more important than weight or weightlessness. :)

    ReplyDelete
  16. An emphatic personal statement and cannot agree more with your take on confidence and weight being inversely proportional. Loved the title and the way you carry yourself! Hugs!

    ReplyDelete
  17. you are so right.We always have one life so live it up. As long as I am not overweight I am fine. U look flawless in ur recent pics, and I would continue to love ur style no mater what size u are.
    <3
    ✿thefashionflite

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hi Ananya, I stumbled upon your blog via indiblogger - and I am so glad that I did. This post reminded me of my own struggle with weight and self esteem. Like you, I had also started measuring myself in terms of my weight; but I soon realised that I was much more than that. I loved this post -and will be reading your blog regularly now:)

    ReplyDelete
  19. Self love is so important! Sometimes you forget why you're lovable, but friends will always remind you :)

    xx Yasmin
    http://banglesandbungalows.com

    ReplyDelete
  20. I appreciate the viewpoint expressed in this blog which is relevant for me too.

    Jitendra Mathur

    ReplyDelete
  21. Yes, confidence is the key and the starting point for sharpening of many skills and attitudes.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Not every body is created the same way, that's why whatever figure we have we must carry it with poise and confidence. Let's not let society dictate what we should look, we are responsible for our body. We must continue to inspire others through grab my essay writing service review and with our perspective in life.

    ReplyDelete